I Bought Myself A Girlfriend
Hey! I’m Rodger. Have you ever made any rash purchases - the ones where when you get back home, you felt petty for your own stupidity, and just go back to the store and return the things you bought? Here’s the thing - I recently sort of bought myself a girlfriend.
No, I’m not a millionaire or anything. And the family I come from is pretty average in terms of income, ‘cause my dad’s a carpenter and my mom’s an illustrator. We were not poor though. I mean, my parents could afford to send me to college, where I’m studying now in my second year.
You might ask where I got money for a girlfriend though, and I’ll tell you: when I was 14 and dad and I went to the city to do his errands, I saw an extremely awesome car. It was an Aston Martin, and it was one of the latest models. And when I heard my dad’s sigh, which, I thought was indicating his own unfulfilled dreams, I decided that when I grow up, I’ll do everything in my power to provide my parents with a better life.
For starters, I began looking for any way to make a dollar whenever it was possible and I saved all the money I earned. At first, I was a helper in a flower shop, run by our neighbor. Then I worked part-time at the carwash and as a janitor in one of the local cafés, and as soon as I entered college, I started making money as a teaching assistant. So, by the time this story happened, I managed to save a few thousand dollars and was right away thinking of either starting any business or investing it in the stock market. And that's when I met Becky.
Oh, she looked like a model or something, with her perfect body, long blond hair, and big green eyes. For me, it was love at first sight, or a spark, or whatever it's called. But she obviously was not considering me as a possible boyfriend. I’m not sure if she would have noticed me at all if I hadn’t distinguished myself during our macroeconomics class, fending off the professor’s questions. Anyway, as soon as she understood that I was kinda smart, she began being friendly with me. And even though my fellas were saying that she only needed me to do her homework, I didn’t mind, ‘cause I thought that this friend zone would eventually give me an opportunity to ask her out.
You would be amazed if you knew how many times I tried to ask Becky on a date. But she was always in the middle of something important. I knew that such a special girl deserved something special, so I thought that maybe it was the way I was asking her out that didn’t actually work. That’s why once, I mustered up all the courage that I had and asked her on a date right in the middle of a lecture. I promised to make it a real fairy tale for her if she said yes. People around us began giggling and hooting, and the professor promised to arrange a personal fairytale for me in the form of a pop-quiz, but all that didn’t matter, because Becky finally said “yes.”
It turned out that it was extremely hard to come up with a perfect scenario for a fairy tale date. All my friends were suggesting different classy things, like a bouquet of roses and a walk in the park, but I desperately wanted to amaze her. I thought it wouldn’t be a big deal if I put my hand in my savings to, you know, make that evening totally memorable, and for that, I definitely needed some money.
So, on the big day, I ordered the flowers to be delivered to her starting in the early morning and kept different bouquets coming every hour till 6 P.M., when we were supposed to meet at a restaurant. After dinner, we went to a park, where a horse and carriage were already waiting for us, and after a short ride, we sat together on a park bench with a wonderful view of the night city and I gave her a nice silver bracelet. Yeah, I know, I might have been a little stupid to risk that much, ‘cause she promised me nothing, but I was totally in love with Becky. And when she gave me a kiss I understood that it was worth every dollar I spent.
Of course, since that date, we became an actual couple and during the whole next week from time to time, I heard other girls whispering and gossiping about that night, which actually meant that Becky liked it so much that she kept bragging to everyone about how romantic I was. I was totally happy with her and I basically felt like I could fly. There was only one thing that didn’t bother me at first, but at some point started to become very suspicious - Becky kept demanding presents and surprises from me. And even though I knew that all girls like experiencing that kind of stuff from time to time, I couldn’t help but think that my girlfriend turned out to be quite a materialistic gist.
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